It's National Mentoring Month: Why Mentorship Matters
As a low-income, African American male, from the inner city area of South "Central" Los Angeles, I was not supposed to make it to UCLA. Statistics suggested that I was either going to end up in jail or drop out of school, or both.
Though statistics have improved over time, when I applied to college, African American students in the Los Angeles Unified School District had a reported dropout rate of 23% and a projected dropout rate of more than 30%. Furthermore, less than a quarter of African American students met the University of California and California State University eligibility requirements. Although I was fortunate enough not to be another statistic, my understanding of the socially reproductive, stratifying, and inequitable nature of schools have been the driving force of my work within my community;
And naturally mentorship has been a major part of that type of work.
I have learned that mentorship is paramount because it helps to fill the gaps that many young people experience when trying to connect dots that have not been connected before: for me, that gap was attending college. My parents would be the first to say that we all went to school for the first time together! In college, I found my Fraternity (pictured in the cover photo) who would serve as mentors and brothers committed to helping me learn the unfamiliar territory of the University and subsequent career paths. They were there to coach me through college, the graduate school application process and to provide keen insight about the "hidden curriculum" that only the highest achieving students ever learn to master. The bond of our brotherhood still holds strong today -- in fact that picture was taken at last year's Holiday party -- and it's relevant because as we get older, new chapters in our lives unfold, and fresh mentorship is needed. It really is a never-ending process.
As a benefactor of effective mentorship, I have been committed to mentoring the generation coming up after me. Below is a picture of my little and I graduating from the Big Brothers Big Sisters Program -- a program that my Fraternity partners with nationally.
Mentorship matters because it's real. It is human contact, interpersonal relationship, social capital, and a committed transfer of knowledge. Mentorship is essential to human development and provides us with a means to be purposeful and intentional in supporting others both within and outside of our communities. For me, I found mentors in various aspects of my life: at church, at school, and professionally. Below are a few quick rules of engagement that I have learned along the way:
1) Be Honest
Vulnerability and transparency are not just important to building relationships but are the sustaining factors in any important relationship. Good mentorship is often bi-directional.
2) Be Available
Consistency is the manifested behavior of commitment. Pick up the phone, respond to the text message, and just be there. Be available.
3) Be Unconditional
Mentorship transcends friendship. It is soul work and often times things don't go as planned, life changes but unconditional really means through thick and thin. Don't take this lightly because someone is counting on you.
